Regarding managing emotions, I count myself among many other people who struggle with this particular part of life. I had a graphic that I was going to post, but it seems as though it has gone missing along with so many other things I can’t seem to find in my house when I need them.
Anyway, the graphic goes something like this: As human beings we are vessels filled with all kinds of emotions, which is a good thing, in my humble opinion. It is the way we express our emotions and whether or not they are appropriate at the time/place we express them is the issue of the graphic.
An example: A parent with a 5-year-old child attempts to reason with their child about an action they have taken which the parent considers to be wrong (dragging the cat by one leg across the floor or by the tail; shouting at parent or other children; hitting or otherwise hurting another child are some examples of this). Of course, the child will be automatically on the defensive when/if the parent confronts the child about this behavior. The parent, in this instance has to choose what kind of emotion to display to their child: outright anger, which may lead to punitive punishment(s) or patience and calmness leading to a dialogue with the child which is done on their level of understanding so that the child understands that whatever action they have done was wrong and ways to figure out how to not make that mistake again. A parent may think that when this dialogue is done that their child understands and that the issue is done and that the child won’t make that same mistake again, however, that parent would be wrong. Studies have shown that the frontal lobe of the brain, which is the place where impulsiveness and understanding of the consequences of our actions live, does not fully mature until the mid- 20s. Here is a link to an MIT article explaining how this works. If and/or when the child repeats the same mistake over and over again can make the parent extremely frustrated and angry and this anger my overtake any previous ideas of speaking calmly with their child. The parent may resort to outright punishment (this may include time outs, spankings, or escalations of any kind of violence towards the child). (My belief is that any kind of violence towards a child, even spanking, is sort of a “gateway” to more and more mistreatment of the child. This is why I choose not to spank. I used to use time-outs, but that just fostered emotional distance between myself and my child. So, now, we use “time-ins” where we both sit quietly for about 5 minutes and talk about what we are feeling and what we can do that can further a healthy relationship between ourselves. Also, we discuss what behavior is inappropriate and what is appropriate depending on the circumstance. Always remembering to speak to my child in way that she can understand. Otherwise, I’m just speaking into the air, which provides further frustration for me and my child.)
Before any violence or yelling takes place towards the child (or any other person an individual may be having problems with), it behooves the person who is trying to manage their emotions in a healthy way to stop and take a breath or even walk away for a few minutes to try to get some perspective on what is really happening instead of having a knee-jerk emotional reaction. I’m not saying that emotions are bad. We were given emotions for a reason and in the right time and place,displaying one’s emotions is great and appropriate. For instance: I can’t watch two people get married, whether is man/woman, man/man, woman/woman or any other kind of marriage without tearing up a little or outright crying. It’s not that I’m sad. I just feel so happy at weddings and that is the way my emotion at that time is displayed and I feel that this is appropriate as long as I don’t go into some kind of loud wailing or do something else to take attention off the wedding and onto myself. That would be totally inappropriate.
Mostly the emotion I’m speaking of here is anger, but this can also be applied to thoughts which take us down the spiral into depression. When I worked in a Christian street ministry and taught bible study, I referred to this as “taking every thought captive to the obedience of the Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:5) Even though, at that time, I used this method in a bible study setting it does apply to every day life even if one does not espouse the Christian faith. When a thought comes along about my past, for instance, I can choose to either entertain that thought or cast it aside and opt for a more positive and/or more healthy thought pattern. Sometimes we choose to wallow in depression. I can’t say that I haven’t done this. I have. I tend to have the most trouble with this at night after my daughter has fallen asleep. Since I don’t have anything to distract me, it’s easier for those damaging thoughts to creep in. Again, the challenge here is to choose which thoughts to entertain. This can be a very hard process and it takes some time for a person to recognize certain thoughts as damaging and/or unhealthy before that person can begin to stop the cycle and take hold of their thoughts and choose to move toward a healthier place mentally and emotionally.
I am challenged with this on a daily basis several times a day. It so happens that my biggest challenges are dealing with anger, depression and anxiety. I want to model healthy behavior for my daughter, but am not always successful. So when I am not, I have made it a priority to try to explain to her, in a way that she can understand, that I am sorry for my bad/inappropriate behavior and that I will do my best to get better.
I don’t think I’m alone in struggling with this. In my humble opinion, managing one’s emotions is one of the things our society as a whole is seriously lacking. We don’t have very many models to go by. In our culture of instant gratification, if we (as a collective) perceive that we are not getting what we want we tend to lose our collective shit and jump right over the fence into proverbial left field.
This brings me to Donald Trump. This person is not a good model for managing emotions. He displays such a lack of emotional control that he can seem to be petty and childish at times. I don’t watch him speak very often as I try to stay away from the “news” because it depresses me, but seriously, my five-year-old has better control of her emotional outbursts. I’m not going to get into Trump-bashing, but suffice it to say: I did not vote for him.
A few days ago, on February 4th to be exact, there was a call for all witches or anyone who practices the magickal arts to perform a hexing and/or a binding on Donald Trump. I did not participate in that and here’s why.
- I subscribe to the belief of the universal law of “3 x 3”. Meaning, whatever energy you put out you get back times three, be it positive or negative. I don’t believe in “black” or “white” or “gray” magick. I believe it is the intent of the person performing whatever spell or ritual is done that makes it either dark, light or gray. Everyone has some darkness, some light and some gray areas. So again: intent is what matters here. If I had done a hexing or binding on Donald Trump, I would have invited that energy to come back and basically punch me in the face. Hard.
- I recently learned, after performing many binding spells, that whatever you bind is bound to you. A few years ago, out of desperation and fear for my life, I performed a binding ritual with a mirror or “bounce back” effect in it. Meaning that I bound the person from hurting me or my child and should that person attempt any harm towards me or my child that all the energy that was put into those actions or thoughts would, in effect, “bounce back” on that person. It’s sort of like a hex, but not overtly so because it all depends on how much negative energy that person puts out towards the caster of the binding spell. Now, after about 4 years, I realize that this person hardly ever leaves my thoughts. The hard part is that I do not want to think about this person, because I don’t want to draw that person’s thoughts towards me or my child. After some serious meditation on this issue and doing some research, I realized that as long as I keep this person bound with the spell, this person is bound to me because of the spell I did. I think it goes without saying that I do not, in any way, wish to bound in any sort of fashion (spiritual or otherwise) to Donald Trump. So, I left that alone.
- Whether for good or ill, Donald Trump is our president now. I believe that if he wasn’t meant to be in that position for some reason or other, that he would not be there. I don’t believe in coincidences or “luck”. I believe everything happens (or doesn’t happen) for a reason. I may not always understand that reason, but I don’t want to mess with what the universe has planned for Donald Trump. Also, and this may sound like it came directly from my mother, I believe that very soon he will have enough rope to metaphorically hang himself. I prefer to let him make his own messes and lie in his own bed rather than call on the spirits to do it for him. Again, I don’t want that energy to come back at me. I’m not judging anyone who participated. I think people, in general, should have the freedom to follow their beliefs. I follow mine. You follow yours. Live and let live.
- Finally, I don’t wish Donald Trump or his family any harm. I will, however, stock up on popcorn in anticipation of the day he makes his bed and then has to lay in it.
Since I can’t post videos on here anymore since I don’t have a paid account, here is the link to my video on my YouTube account of How To Make A Hoodoo Sweetenin’ Jar.
I hope ya’ll like it!
But did you know that you can deliberately use your trusty altar candles as a trance induction device? This technique has been known in the East for centuries, as part of the discipline known as tratakam, or yoga of the fixed gaze. It is defined as sustained, single-pointed focus on an internal or external point. The practice helps to improve concentration, access altered states, and achieve inner sight. Candle-gazing in particular is thought to stimulate the pineal gland, the light-sensitive “third eye” which is linked with clairvoyance.
I first discovered this technique would work for scrying in the somewhat unlikely setting of a strip-mall yoga center. The class was what I call the “hatha-plus” variety. We did mostlyasana (physical poses), but now and then the teacher would sneak in a bit of her more esoteric knowledge. One day, after we had completed our asana sequence, the teacher passed out tea lights and informed us we would be trying a candle-gazing meditation before settling down for our final resting pose. The students each sat in a seated position, palms resting on knees, with the candle resting on the floor a few inches in front of the feet. With a straight back and neck, we cast our eyes downward to settle upon the wick of the candle. The teacher dimmed the lights, then walked around the room and lit each candle. Immediately a soothing orange glow filled my field of vision. The teacher began to lead a rhythmic breathing exercise, and invited us to alternately open and close our eyes. When my eyes were open and gazing at the candle, I felt blissfully absorbed by the flame. With my eyes closed, I could still see the after-image of the candle and feel its light and heat, but there was also a welcome darkness, pregnant with images and meaning. I opened my eyes for another breath, then slipped back into the darkness. The room I was in disappeared and my sense of time dissolved. I didn’t snap out of it until I heard the instructor abandon her usual clouds-and-honey yoga teacher voice for a sterner tone: “Okay, we’re done working with the candles now. We have ten minutes left in class. Please move to your mats and prepare for shavasana.” Oops.
The effects of the trance gradually wore off as I lay there on my mat, but spectacular visions continued to play out on the inside of my eyelids. Of course, since yogic meditation discourages wandering thoughts, I spent the rest of class trying to banish these “distractions.” It wasn’t until later that I realized that this simple candle meditation had allowed to me to reach a faster, deeper, more visual trance state than I had thus far been able to achieve by scrying alone, and that it might be helpful to hijack the technique for my scrying practice. Incidentally, I no longer have a regular practice of Eastern yoga, mostly because I’m lazy and don’t really like to break a sweat, but also because I don’t always find it to be compatible with the Western esoteric systems I use. Nevertheless, I’m grateful for the time I have spent studying yoga, because it’s helped me to develop concentration, feel more comfortable in my physical body, and perceive and direct my subtle energy.
Want to try this method? Here’s some instructions. (Keep in mind that I’m not a yoga teacher, nor is this method strictly yogic–it’s just a personal practice that I’m sharing because it gets good results.)
So, you’ll need a candle or lantern, a chair (or cushion for the floor), your favorite scrying medium (I generally use a crystal ball ’cause I’m old school like that) and a surface in front of you to rest it on. Light the candle, and make sure you have something non-flammable to set it down on. (Because nothing kills a psychic buzz like accidentally burning your house down.) While you can do this in exercise in pitch darkness, I find that the contrast creates too much eyestrain. So I recommend lighting a few other candles around the room or having another dim light source going at the same time.
Next, sit up straight with your scrying medium directly in front of you. Place the candle in the center of your line of sight, in front of the speculum. (You can always move it away to the side when you’re ready to scry). Once you’re all situated, do whatever you usually do to prepare for divination: ground and center, set your intention, cast your circle, invoke your guides, whatever. Now begin taking some yogic breaths. This is deliberate, deep, and rhythmic breathing. (Plenty of tutorials online if you need a refresher.) Breathe as long as you need to feel your body relax and your mind to begin to clear. As you continue to breathe steadily, fix your attention on the candle flame and blink naturally. (If your ocular muscles start to strain or your eyes begin to water, then you’re doing it wrong. Relax.) See the flame of the candle, feel its warmth spreading out, observe its tiny movements. Visualize two beams of yellow light, one from each of your open eyes, traveling out to the candle to form a triangle. Light from the candle, the apex of the triangle, is traveling back along these invisible paths to your eyes and into your brain. A third beam appears, going from the candle to your third eye, bisecting the triangle. When the light reaches the space between your eyes, it spreads out and massages the area with light. This is a breath-linked practice, so if at any time you get distracted, go back a step and focus on the pattern of your breathing.
The next step is to coordinate the blinking of your eyes to your breath. The next time you breathe in, intensify your gaze ever so slightly and draw in the light, as if you were hoarding it for later. As you breathe out, close your eyes. If you’ve been gazing at the flame for any length of time at all, you’ll notice a “burn in” effect–the shape of the fire will still be visible between your closed eyelids. Open your eyes as you draw another breath. Then close them, continuing to gaze at the “phantom” flame. Continue for a set number of repetitions, or, if you’re not a counter, until you feel your consciousness begin to shift. Now gaze at the candle for two breaths (in and out, then in and out again), and rest your eyes for a count of two. Do this for a little while, then shift to three breaths. As the space between open-eye periods gets longer, more complex images may begin to appear in the darkness. (By the time I get up to three breaths, I’m usually spaced, but you could try a longer count if you like.) When you feel ready, or when your inner vision begins to awaken, set the candle aside and take up your bowl, mirror, or crystal. As you gaze at it, allow your faculty of sight to gently transfer to its surface. If your preferred method is fire scrying or closed-eye scrying, then you’re all set to go already, you lucky mofo.
Well, I hope this has been helpful. If you’ve tried this candle-gazing technique or something similar, I’d be very interested to hear how it went in the comments.
I used a green candle earlier, which was anointed and dedicated to St. Lucy, to scry and try to find out things unseen to me: I needed to see if someone is working against me in the spiritual realm and if they were, I wanted to find out who it was. I didn’t get much, but I have only tried to scry a couple of other times. It’s a form of divination and requires intense focus so that your mind doesn’t wander. I included this blogpost because I found it very helpful. I hope you do as well.
This spell is for when someone is trying to wrongly throw you off your property or somewhere that you are staying/renting. This effectively takes the control away from the other person and puts it back in your hands so that you can leave of your own volition instead of being forced out.
What You Need
1. 3 Square Head Nails
2. Olive Oil
3. One garlic clove (crushed)
4. Empty Jar
Working The Spell
1. Pour the olive oil in the empty jar.
2. Put the crushed garlic clove in the jar.
3. Anoint the nails with the olive oil/garlic mixture.
4. Take the anointed nails and the hammer and go to the front door of your house on the outside.
5. Hammer the three anointed nails into the very bottom part of the door frame on the outside while focusing your mind to visualize your feet being “nailed” to the property.
You’re now done.
Just a side note: As with all spells, this one also is all about the power of your mind and your visualizations. You must visualize very clearly your feet being “nailed” to the property. Do this well, and the spell will work well.
1. Write Psalm 130 on one side of a piece of white cloth.
2. Write the names of your competition on the other side.
3. Put the cloth in side of a quart size jar.
4. Fill the jar with pennies.
5. Throw the jar in a river.
Your competition will be eliminated.
I haven’t tried this yet, but I plan to. I still have to get a quart jar and enough pennies. Then I will have to make a two hour trip to throw it in a river. After I have completed it I will give updates on what happens. As always with any spell, you have to believe it when you do it. You have to put all of your energy and focus into it.