Tarot Journal

TAROT CARD OF THE DAY AND MEDITATION ON PRAYER

four of wands

REVERSED FOUR OF WANDS TAROT CARD MEANINGS

Biddy Tarot

Four of Wands Tarot Card Meanings tarot card meaning

The Four of Wands reversed suggests there is a lack of harmony or a breakdown in communication in your family or home. There may be tension between family members or loved ones and you are finding yourself getting caught up in other people’s concerns and relationship problems. This may leave you feeling uncertain about your own relationships and what you can and cannot depend on. You may also be going through a period of transition in your family and home life and feeling some tension as a result.

Similarly, you may find your home situation becomes increasingly unstable. There may be an external threat to the peace and happiness you once had in your home. You may be placed into a temporary situation which appeases your immediate concerns but does not yet solve the longer-term issues. Depending on your living arrangements, it may be better to move home for the time being to allow things to settle.

Given the upright Four of Wands reflects stability, the reversal of this card can indicate that you are going through a period of transition where there is little stability and security. You may be experiencing multiple changes in your life, such as changing jobs, moving house and/or leaving a relationship. While you know that this is an important transition that you need to make, it can be quite unsettling, leaving you feeling out of balance and uncertain about your future.

In a relationship reading, the Four of Wands reversed reflects someone who may not be looking for a particularly long-term relationship but is willing to invest in it for the time being. There is a lack of commitment, or even a fear of commitment, which is preventing them from wanting a long-term relationship.

Meditation on Prayer for February 22, 2015

Amy E. Dean

Prayer is neither black magic nor is it a form of a demand note. Prayer is a relationship.~ John Heuss

A conversation requires two parts: talking and listening. When we are only talking, that is a monologue. When someone lectures, we listen. Prayer can be a form of conversation, yet if we examine the way we pray we may find it’s a monologue.

We pray to ask for answers or guidance, to express our gratitude, and to bless those we care for. It’s wonderful to open up a channel to our Higher Power by beginning the conversation, but unless we allow time to listen we will never really develop a dialogue.

We can begin to change our way of praying. We can limit our requests so we are not listing a series of wishes or demands. We can ask for patience to listen and then allow a few moments to listen. The answers will come to us and our guidance will be given when we are truly ready to receive it. An equal balance of talking and listening will help strengthen our relationship with our Higher Power.

I will pray and then listen, to allow my Higher Power some time to communicate with me. 


Just a personal side note: I find that listening is a harder task by far than praying. It’s easy to ask for something. I pray for others all the time. It’s also easy to ask for help to get ourselves out of a bad situation. However, listening takes some practice and we don’t always get the answer we think we want or when we think the right time is. We have to be truly open and willing to accept whatever comes from the Higher Power and/or our Higher Selves and we have to make the time for it. In the spiritual dimension, things happen in the blink of an eye, but if we are not ready, then the answer will hang there waiting on us to open the door.

Blessed Be.

~Myrelle


 

TAROT CARD OF THE DAY: THREE OF PENTACLES AND A MEDITATION ON LOVE, RELATIONSHIPS AND WORK

shadowscapes three of pentacles

Biddy Tarot

The Three of Pentacles, like the Threes in the other suits, represents the initial completion of a goal or plan. In this case, the Three implies the fulfilment and manifestation of a creative venture, business, or building project. The inspiration of the individual (i.e. the mason) is beginning to be concreted in the material world, and the decisions of the two (i.e. the two monks) have been made successfully. An initial satisfaction is now being enjoyed and the project is well underway. You have all of the skills necessary to accomplish your goals in life, thus you have the ability to succeed in all your ventures. You are keen to improve the quality of your life or your work.

The message of the Three of Pentacles is one of encouragement. If you continue to work toward the fulfillment of your dreams and do not allow disillusionment to dampen your enthusiasm, ultimately you will experience prosperity and success in your goals. You need to do work that is satisfying to you and that you can be truly proud of. What new beginnings are you experiencing in the material realm? Is there some project or creative venture you have been putting off because of fear of failure? The Three of Pentacles indicates that dreams can be made real with persistence, determination, and effort.

The Three of Pentacles may also suggest that you need help to complete your work and can draw on the knowledge and experience of others. It may be beneficial to share your work with a partner but only if they are as conscientious as you.

At the core of the Three of Pentacles is the notion of teamwork and collaboration. In the card, we see a young mason working hard on building part of the cathedral. The two monks enter, with their worldly knowledge and spiritual understanding to bring a new perspective to the mason’s work. Even though their backgrounds, experience levels and knowledge is very different, they are able to come together to share their expertise in a way that creates synergy and improved results. There is no ‘us and them’ or any sense of superiority. Rather, each person has something unique to offer and is willing to learn from others involved in the project. Everyone is getting the job done together and is contributing to the group through effective listening and sharing. This is a positive card to see when teamwork, collaboration and cooperation are required between parties with different levels of experience.

The Three of Pentacles also points to the importance of feedback. The mason is open to listening to the monks and taking on their feedback on his progress so far. His primary goal is to do a great job, and he knows that the monks will be able to help him get there. He does not take it personally but uses their feedback and input to continually improve in his work.

Effective planning, management and organisation are also key components of the Three of Pentacles. In order to accomplish significant goals, such as building a monumental cathedral, it is imperative that detailed planning occurs to ensure that all the components are progressing well. This card therefore reflects a time when it is essential to create a detailed plan and to follow a schedule. This is when good project management will pay off.

The companion book to my Shadowscapes tarot cards says this about the Three of Pentacles: 

They work together as one, creating a human ladder and climbing upon each other’s shoulders. With their combined height, they reach upwards, they yearn towards the sky.

Into the stone wall she inscribes her pentacles and her circles. They form a chain of overlapping arcs, like her interlinked relationships: circles sets of inclusion and combination. It is a mathematical equation of human relationships and interactions.

Each arc is inscribed with care, as if they follow a blueprint. Her fingers trail through the stone as easily as if the surface were malleable clay. The solid stone gives way under the soft flesh of her fingertips. such is the power of their combined wills that what is “impossible” suddenly becomes easy, mundane, achievable. They comprehend the power of unity when one works in conjunction with others.

The Three of Pentacles is the embodiment of teamwork, of functioning together as a unit. It underscores competence and achieving beyond the expected. Sometimes the support of others is required to achieve a goal; not everything can be accomplished solo. Not everything needs to be accomplished alone. Reaching out to others is no failing, but working with others requires patience, planning and compromise to adhere to standards of cooperation.


The mediation for today talks about love and relationships:

Love doesn’t just sit there like a stone; it has to be made, like bread, remade all the time, made new. ~ Ursula K. Leguin

In the first phases of a relationship, everything is new and exciting. It seems as though nothing could ever go wrong.

yet as we move out of this “honeymoon” phase of the relationship, problems begin. Suddenly we notice things about the other person that bother us. We seem to have ore disagreements and more difficulties that take longer to solve. We may even silently choose corners, put up walls, and back away from each other.

It’s easy at this stage to want to end the relationship. But not is when the outcome of the relationship is most critical. If we run away from renewing our love and rebuilding the foundations of trust and faith in each other, we will deprive our love of its nourishment for growth. Love takes constant work and needs plenty of patience. Each day can reveal a new layer of love; each stage in a relationship moves us to a new plateau. But only if we are willing.

I can look at my relationships and see the potential for growth. Help me renew my feelings of love through faith.


Personal note:

I think that the talk of work in all of these meditations is apropos, considering the suit of Pentacles is all about work. Personally, I am trying to build an online business through Etsy and this encourages me to keep going and to make clear goals and follow through with my ideas and persistence.

With my relationships, there is a lot going on right now. I noticed yesterday (which was a bit of a crisis day including me breaking down in tears), that I am moving from a place of trust with a friend of mine to a place of mistrust. I thought I knew what to expect from her, but now I have no idea. So, I find myself drawing into myself as a defense mechanism, which is what I’ve always done for protection. I also find myself thinking petty thoughts, which does no one (especially me) any good. Regarding love for her, I can say that I love her in the sense that I don’t want any harm to come to her and her family, but at this point in my life, I’m ready to be separated from her since I feel like she’s literally pulled the rug out from under mine and my daughter’s existence.

Another relationship that has been developing is the relationship I have with my mother. I can say that over the past few years we have gotten closer and that’s a good thing. Like the mediation on love and relationships suggests, keeping this relationship healthy is going to take a lot of work on both our parts, especially since we don’t have that great of a history. However, over the past few years and especially since I’ve had my daughter, she has really been my only advocate and the only one who has consistently supported me in all ways. So, I am glad of that and I try to be supportive in return, although, I don’t have the means to support her monetarily like she has with me. I wish I had it, but I just don’t at this point.

Overall, I think that this day’s tarot card and meditation are positive and encouraging and I feel encouraged, which is good. I really needed it after yesterday. I think all relationships, no matter the kind (romantic, friendship, family) require work on both parts of the people involved. What I mean by this is that when the difficult times come, and they most certainly will, that we have to endeavor to put our egos and trust issues aside for a moment and try to connect with that person. This is hard to do since most of us have major issues with trust and will withdraw into our protective and defensive corners when we feel hurt or threatened. The challenge is to not withdraw. The challenge is to connect and try to work around whatever differences or hardships occur.

Blessed Be.


 

Three of Wands-2/20/14

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As of today, I am going to start pulling a card for myself every day and keeping a journal of them along with my thoughts on the card pulled.
This one is the Three of Wands. It is saying to me that I am standing on a precipice. A place where many have been before.  Some have turned back. I am unable, at this moment to see the way across, but there is a way. I just need to step out in faith and the ground will be there to support me. It connotes a sense of bravery and adventure and a willingness to try new things.


 

Ten of Wands 2/21/14

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This card is the Ten of Wands and features a Dryad (a tree spirit) holding up the weight of a small village. She doesn’t have to, yet she supports them of her own free will. She does it willingly. Her wands are burning low and she may be looking for that source of strength and light which will get her through the present darkness. She is struggling to find that center of creativity and nourishment and feels overwhelmed at times.

I felt this way yesterday with my daughter. I love her beyond all measure, however, sometimes she pushes my buttons and I snap at her. Sometimes I react in the wrong way to her and do or say the wrong thing and I regret it immediately. Why is it that the ones we love the most can push our buttons the easiest? I did feel overwhelmed yesterday, but I managed to get through it with only my guilt and regret left to me to gnaw on as I tried to fall asleep. I am searching in my mind for the way to be more empathetic with her and more kind to her. Sometimes I am convinced that I am doing this motherhood thing all wrong and that I am damaging her emotionally and mentally. I suppose every parent thinks that at one time or another.

I am also waiting to hear about whether or not a company I interviewed with last week will hire me. It would be a very good job and would mean a big move. I think it would be a great change for us. So, I’m worried about that and sort of wandering in darkness until I hear one way or the other. I am groping around trying to find some way to keep myself positive while I wait in this frozen-ness.

I will try aligning my chakras today and doing some mediation and visualization to keep my positive energies going. Yesterday, I smudged my entire apartment and noticed a difference in the atmosphere around me immediately. It seemed that even the wood in the walls relaxed. The light coming in through the windows seemed to get softer and yet brighter simultaneously. Finally, and this is the most important thing, my daughter stopped being so fearful of every shadow she saw.

Love and Light ya’ll!


 

Queen of Pentacles: 2/22/14

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The Queen of Pentacles is the quintessential mother figure. She yearns to nurture and care for others. She has an inner source of strength and warmth that everyone can feel and that draws them to her. So many people in this world are hurting and need a nurturing and caring person in their life. I am finding that as I move forward in my spiritual growth that my heart gets ever more soft and yielding toward people who are hurting. Not that I’m perfect, mind you. I’m far from it. The other night when I was coming out of the grocery store with my daughter, a man passed me by and told me that he had left his wallet at home and asked me for enough money to get a gallon of gas so that he could get home. I gave him five dollars. It’s not much, but this is the first time I have ever given money to a stranger who asked for it. When I got home, I realized all the ways that that could have gone wrong. I am trying to get past my fear to help people. I have operated from a place of fear for so long that it is very hard to get past it. I am hoping to find the middle place between sensible fear and irrational fear.

Love and Light!


 

Seven of Pentacles-2/24/14

imageThis card is all about reaping the rewards of hard work. The Dryad of the Wood stands in her garden wondering if it is time to pick the peaches from the tree. They are ripe, but are they ready to be plucked? Should she pluck them and eat them or leave them to ripen a while longer? You have sown your seeds and waited for them to ripen. Now you are seeing them come to their fruition.  This is a calm moment of the consideration of alternatives and different approaches.

I have actually been sitting here this morning debating on whether or not to call the agency that set up the interview for me to see if they had heard anything from the interviewer. I read this card and decided to call them. They were out to lunch. I will have to let this simmer for a bit longer I suppose and call them later on this afternoon. I am really in need of seeing rewards for my hard work. I am really hoping that I get hired.


 

Six of Cups-Inverted-2/25/14

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If this card had been drawn upright, it would have been a reminder of childhood innocence, imagination, good intentions, noble impulses and simple pleasures.  As it was drawn inverted, I think it is reminding me to see the world through my daughter’s eyes and not to discount her point of view out of hand because it is valid.

The cards have been off today. Last night, I read for someone who had several demons attached to her and one was very familiar to me. It new that I was open to read her cards and it used that moment to attack me spiritually. I got shaky, anxious, nauseous and felt like I had a rock in the pit of my stomach. Afterwards, I prayed, read scripture, took authority over the demon (bound it and rebuked in in Jesus’ name and sent it on it’s way), did a spell to rebound negative energy, took some medicine for anxiety and still could not sleep. I had strange dreams and just tossed and turned. I finally got up about 4:00am and re-saged my entire apartment, including all closets, corners, drawers and cabinets. After that, I was able to sleep some, but still woke up about 9:30am this morning. When I think about it now, I still get an anxious knot in my stomach.

The attack was not pleasant, but I did learn a lesson and that lesson is this: pay attention to your inner voice and when you feel something off during a reading either stop or close off psychically for your own protection. I won’t have something like that around my daughter. As much as I pity this person for being plagued so by demons, it entered my house and I cannot have that. My daughter is more important than anything else and she comes first before anyone or anything.


 

The Sun-2/26/14

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This card suggests enlightenment and understanding; achieving success and prominence. Joy and energy along with radiant good health. This is a very positive card for today and I am very encouraged. I am hoping to get some things accomplished today and I still have hope that I will hear from the interview I went on the week before last that I am hired. I have also felt that my energy and connection has been off since the night of the spiritual attack. So, this is very encouraging. I am content, at least for this moment.


 

Three of Swords-3/2/2014

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This card shows someone who has been pierced through the heart or feels like they have been. This person feels very alone and may feel betrayed.  This person feels grief and heartbreak, loneliness, isolation and separation. This person feels abandoned by the world and like their fragile emotional state has been torn asunder.

However, this weeping of the heart may be a necessary cleansing. It encourages to let the weeping come and drain away all of the black blood from the wounded heart to be purified and then lift up the wings to fly once again.

I am never more astounded than I am right now of how accurately the cards can tell what is going on in my heart and mind. I wept while in prayer this morning. I feel that my choices in this world are diminishing. I feel that as much as I try to provide for my daughter and myself that I will always be frustrated in my attempts to give us a better life. I am again feeling like I am trying to shove a square peg into a round hole. I have no idea which way I’m supposed to go. I don’t know if I should forge ahead like I normally do or if I should just rest and let the universe show me the way. I can’t sleep. My stomach is torn up every day. Yet, my daughter is the only person who brings me back from the brink of nothingness. Mercury goes out of retrograde today, so maybe tomorrow will be better.


 

3/4/14-Page of Pentacles

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I seem to get this card a lot when I practice reading for myself. She signifies opportunities for growth and prosperity.  She holds the spark of potential, but that potential is only what you choose to make it. She is trustworthy, diligent and scholarly and yet still able to engage in a world of physical enjoyment. She is practical, down to earth and is one who reflects before acting. She is lighthearted and joyous.

This pretty much describes me to a “t”. Except that right now I don’t really feel “lighthearted” or “joyous”. I can say that I feel better than I did yesterday, which is a positive. Everything I have been getting lately is telling me that I should sit back and enjoy the fruits of my hard work, but when I’m not doing something I get anxious and I fret. I have also been getting that I need to learn how to let go of the need to always be in control of everything, which is really an illusion anyway, because no one can really control anything in this world. We all just do what we can with the resources available to us at any point in time. You can suit up, show up and roll with the changes or you can choose to be miserable.


 

 

Seven of Pentacles-3/8/14

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This is the second time I’ve drawn this card since I started doing this last month. The suit of Pentacles symbolizes work and all the things we do while working. I feel like I am always working to accomplish something. I am really wanting to make a good life for my daughter and myself and to that end, I feel that if I’m not working at something then I’m failing. That’s when I get anxious and depressed. I feel the best when I know that I’m working toward something positive or an attainable goal.

This particular card is about having sown the seeds of success and deciding whether or not to reap them right now. It is about rewards for hard work. It is also about contemplating life and different choices and approaches to it.


 

Six of Wands 3/10/14

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The suit of Wands is associated with the element of fire. The first thing I felt when I drew this card and saw that it was inverted was that my inner fire may be burning low today. Otherwise, this card speaks of someone who is over confident because they have conquered many people and difficult situations to get where they are. It speaks of victory and confidence in skills and abilities, but also speaks of a warning to avoid the hubris and lassitude that may come from sitting on top of the mountain.

Since my card is inverted, it is telling me that I don’t feel confident in my skills and abilities today. It is speaking to me of feeling like I will never be able to get to the top of the mountain. It is speaking of frustration.

I am frustrated in my role as a parent. My daughter is two and has the requisite tantrums which accompany two year olds. She screams, hits, sometimes bites, calls me names…the whole nine. At these times, I feel woefully ill equipped to deal with her. I am mainly an over indulgent parent and I’m very demonstrative with my affections. I hug and kiss her a lot and carry her around. She sits in my lap most times when we are at home. It’s when I stop being over indulgent and am firm on the boundaries that the tantrums come. I don’t know whether to just let her have her screaming fit or to try to intervene at that point. I definitely don’t want to spank her or use any other kind of physical intervention. I’ve tried “time out”, but that doesn’t work very well. She won’t stay where she’s supposed to. I’ve tried reasoning with her and explaining cause and consequence in a way hopefully that she can understand, but it doesn’t seem to stick in her brain. The next time I tell her that it’s bedtime or that she can’t jump on the bed because she will fall off, the tantrum will be inevitable. It leaves me feeling emasculated, feeling like a bad person and a bad mother, and feeling guilty for being so under equipped to deal with her at those moments. What I mainly do during these moments is pray silently for patience and that I can be enabled to be kind towards her no matter what her actions towards me may be.  I cannot express how much I love her and I always want her to know that she is my treasure and my aim is to always treat her as such.


 

 

9/18/14

knight of wands Today I drew the Knight of Wands in the reversed position. Evidently, there is some kind of message that I’m waiting on that will be delayed, but I still must wait patiently for it. It also could mean a joyous and light-hearted, light-haired man coming into my life.

I’m good with waiting on messages. I’m trying to get my federal disability approved now. I will be calling a lawyer tomorrow to set up an appointment to talk about his services. I’m guessing this is what this card is referring to, but really it could be anything. Or it could even be talking about someone else, but my intuition is telling me it’s probably about my disability.

As far as a man coming into my life right now. I’m not so sure about that. Friend-wise might be ok, but romantically probably not. I’m raising my three-year-old daughter by myself and I don’t need the complication of a relationship added to my already difficult life. Yes, I am assuming that the relationship would be difficult. I understand that some people’s aren’t, but all of mine have been. I don’t need or want those complications. Since I’ve had my daughter, I’m also very overprotective of her and don’t let many people at all into our lives simply because I don’t want her exposed to that drama. I also don’t want to be one of those women who thinks she’s met the love of her life when all the time her man has been molesting her daughter. I’ve seen this happen so many times and I’m extremely on my guard because of it. As a survivor of sexual abuse, I know that I am a target for predators. Another reason there are only a very few people in our lives. I would rather have a few people whom I love and know love me than a bunch of people I don’t really trust. I’m not man-bashing. I guess what I’m saying is that I’m just not ready.

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